Annie Eighteen-eyes

  Luis bent over the kitchen sink and spat toothpaste. He started to place his toothbrush in the holder by the sink, but stopped when a voice spoke from the bedroom.

  “That was only one minute and fifty-six seconds. Dentists recommend two minutes.”

  It felt to him like two minutes, but he knew better than to argue. He squeezed a dab of toothpaste onto his toothbrush, then spent four more seconds brushing.

  “Great job, honey,” the voice called.

  After wiping his mouth, Luis stepped into the bedroom. Annie was positioned in front of her work desk. It barely fit beside their bed, but she needed a longer desk to hold the many files laid out before her. They were arranged in a perfect grid, each the same distance from the others, just like Annie liked. None of them was open.

  “Busy day?” Luis asked as he pulled on his suit coat.

  “That’s yet to be seen.”

  He cocked his head as he looked at her. Sometimes she said things that sounded like jokes, but she always claimed it was unintentional. He was inclined to believe her. Annie possessed many traits, but a sense of humor wasn’t one of them.

  Luis walked across the bedroom and leaned down to give her a kiss. He had to use caution, careful not to run into any of her eyes. She had thirteen connected to her face and head, but five eyes floated freely just off her face. He’d learned early in their courtship that just because those five weren’t connected didn’t mean they couldn’t experience pain when he’d accidentally struck one with an errant pickleball shot. He kissed a small eyeless space on her forehead, then headed for the bedroom door.

  “I’m going to pick up dinner at Lombardi’s on the way home.”

  She tilted her head for a moment, a series of her eyes blinking in unison.

  “Don’t. Fourteen seconds ago, the County Health Inspector found mold in their walk-in freezer,” Annie said, a look of great concentration on her face. “From the sounds of it, she’s about to shut them down.”

  Luis sighed. He’d really been looking forward to some Lombardi’s.

  “Okay, I guess text me later what you’re in the mood for.”

  He left the bedroom and made his way to the front door. His cell phone buzzed, and he pulled it out.

  ANNIE: You’re forgetting your lunch in the fridge.

  Luis turned back and collected his lunch.

  “Thanks, babe!” he yelled as he left.

  The traffic on the freeway was worse than usual. He took an early exit, thankful to be out of the traffic jam even if it meant having to take surface streets the rest of the way to the office. His phone buzzed, and the text message appeared on the vehicle's display screen.

  ANNIE: The speed limit is 30, not 31.

  A whisper of anger sounded out somewhere deep in his chest, but he removed his foot from the gas pedal and slowed down.

  It didn’t take long for the tedium of the surface streets to start grating on his nerves. He seemed to catch every red light, and begrudgingly, he admitted to himself that staying on the freeway would’ve been quicker. His phone buzzed.

  ANNIE: On your current route, you will arrive for work two minutes late.

  “I know!” Luis yelled at the screen.

  His phone buzzed immediately.

  ANNIE: Dr. Patel has warned that anger is bad for your blood pressure.

  Luis choked down an angry reply, instead remaining silent. He did his best to hurry the rest of the way there, careful not to break any traffic laws in the process. He parked and did a half walk/half run toward the building. Checking his watch, he saw that it was two minutes past when his shift began. His phone buzzed, and he checked it as he scanned his badge at the front door.

  ANNIE: Your boss just walked by your desk and paused to note your absence. His expression suggested feelings of disappointment.

  Luis growled, rushing inside and going straight to his desk.

  “Good morning, everyone!” he announced loudly, hoping his boss might overhear and realize Luis had arrived.

  After a few hours of tedious work, Luis took his first break of the day. He went to the break room and got a foam coffee cup and filled it with coffee. Opening the cabinet just above the coffee maker, he reached for a lid. His hand had to search around in the box for a moment before it finally found the last lid. He popped it onto his cup and turned to leave the break room. After taking a few steps, his phone buzzed.

  ANNIE: Restock the lids.

  Careful not to display any outward signs of his frustration, Luis turned around. He set his coffee down on a table, then went over to the cabinets. The supplies were way at the back, and he had to get down on his hands and knees to reach the box of coffee cup lids. When he got back to his feet, he saw that Shaileen, one of his co-workers, was standing in the break room door. She watched as he opened the box of lids, then put them in place above the coffee maker.

  “Good ol’ Luis, always going above and beyond and doing the right thing,” she said, brushing past him to reach for a foam cup. “That Annie must be a special lady to hold down a man like you.”

  His cheeks reddened a bit as he chuckled and nodded.

  “Yes, she is very special,” Luis said.

  His phone buzzed. He pulled it from his pocket and glanced at the screen.

  ANNIE: And beautiful, too.

  “And beautiful too,” Luis added. “I’m a lucky man.” 

  Checking his watch, he realized that his break was almost over. He quickly made his way back to his desk, knowing that if he was even a second late, he’d most certainly hear about it.